Well, I am here at True North in Santa Rosa. It's an old apartment complex that has been converted into this health center. It looks a bit like a motel with a lovely courtyard and as I sit in my room I can hear and see a fountain and lovely gardens. There are huge umbrellas in the courtyard with people enjoying the beautiful weather. There are lounge chairs and beautiful trees. All in all, a fine setting to spend nearly two weeks.
Where to start, where to start....
I'm here because I suffer from chronic idiopathic hives which means that no doc I've been to can tell me what is going on. I had them for a year, then they went away for a year, then came back and I've lost track of the ons and offs since then. I only have them at night and they itch like crazy. No OTC medications have helped, but I still take antihistamines because I can't stand to do nothing. Sometimes they attack my larynx which is miserable and scary. And sometimes I get facial swelling of lips and eyes so I look delightfully cartoonish. I figured this is worth a shot - I seriously don't want to take the toxic meds that I know a rheumatologist would prescribe.
When I chatted with Dr. Goldhamer on the phone a couple of weeks ago, he said that I should eat light before coming here - I don't remember exactly what he said and surprisingly, the information wasn't contained in the document that they sent to me in preparation. Wish it had been. Anyway, I did a fruit and veggie day yesterday and purposely ate dinner at 5:30 PM so that when I got here I would already have started my fast. Oops - not supposed to do that, but I didn't know. So it is now 1:15 pm and I haven't eaten anything since that light dinner yesterday. I wouldn't say I'm exactly HUNGRY but I have felt more comfortable. I am supposed to see a TN intern sometime today. I don't think I will get to see my doctor until Wednesday which is a bit of a disappointment - I had figured I'd see someone today, assuming I got here early enough. It's all about expectations, isn't it?
Dr. Goldhamer is giving a lecture at 2 pm and I will, of course, go. Sadly it is in the dining room - can't escape seeing and smelling food anywhere! (I'm not really complaining about that - I just find it a bit funny).
I am in the tiniest room that they have (which is the type I signed up for). I am in a suite of rooms that has one big bedroom with its own bathroom, one medium sized bedroom and my tiny one. I share a bathroom with the medium sized room and there is no one there at the moment. There is a husband and wife in the largest room - met the husband, very nice and healthy looking. They are on their 3rd week of fasting.
I also met Mandy from the UWL boards and her son. She looks terrific and doesn't seem negatively impacted by her 7 day fast. I hope to be able to chat with her more another time.
Back to food - in the food room there are fresh fruits and veggies out at all time There are cooked meals put out 3 times a day at normal times. The dining room is very multipurpose - it's where they hold classes and there is a big tv and tons of movies and puzzles and books. There is also a very small exercise room with a couple of pieces of equipment and weights. There is some kind of class every day - I think I had assumed there would be more - like the meditation class is only given on Sundays - but that's fine - just good to know what to expect. I wonder how I will feel about all of the cooking demonstrations - whether that will be hard. I can't bear to miss them so this will be interesting.
My worries? Lots of them. The informed consent document that you sign is terrifying and makes me feel like an alternative medicine idiot. I am convinced, of course, that I will be getting every bad symptom and that I'm going to damage my heart and organs permanently. But seeing all of the people who are here looking so healthy is pretty calming.
More worries - what if this doesn't work? Oy! Can't go there.
And lastly, for now, how can I go all of this time without walking and hiking. I am, understandably, not allowed off the premises because of the worry that I will faint or feel ill. But I am used to lots of movement all day and this is going to be hard. You would laugh if you saw the pile of work I brought and the books - I can't imagine what I will do with myself all day, every day, day after day. Binge on Netflix? Or actually do the work I brought? Or, god forbid, talk to someone???
Enough for now. An adventure. All for me. All for me.
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